End of the Month!

My Happy Scale chart is finally back in the green! Hooray!!! Crisis over.

It's amazing that we're through January already.

It's even more amazing that today it was in the 50s and all the snow has melted. And I live in western New York! I am totally NOT complaining, let me tell you. It makes for great running conditions and just not having to navigate snow and ice all the time is so, so nice.

Anyway. Since I last checked in a week ago, things have been pretty great! Things have felt right. The intuitive eating I've been trying out the past few weeks seems to be working well for me. There are some days when I do enter my food and calculate the calories on MyFitnessPal, but more as a check-in to see how I do on guesstimating my intake. Otherwise, I've been trying to eat reasonably and eat more better foods than not. I'm learning to trust myself and food more.

And I'm continuing to build my base miles for running. As I'd mentioned before I was down to running once a week, but last week and this week I've built back up to 8-10 miles split among three sessions. I'm trying hard not to care too much about my pace and just focus on getting the work done and feeling good about that alone, no matter how fast I'm going. My official half marathon training begins in just over a week. I'm a little nervous about being able to do it at the end of the 17 weeks, seeing how getting two, three, or four miles seems challenging now. There's a lot of negative thinking I battle during my runs and I need to get past that – the truth is, if I do the work there is no reason I shouldn't be able to finish the half in June, and again in October.

I finished out the month at 270, which I am pleased with – a six pound loss and getting back on track is very happy-making. I have been so back-and-forth in this weight range that I feel like I'd do just about anything to get into the 260s again and just keep going, never to return. But how many times have I made that statement? Too many. It's not that I didn't mean it those times before, but I was obviously lacking something. This time my determination is so real, so palpable. I can taste that I CAN finally get past this wall I've been facing for months.

One big thing that I really need to remember is that I've managed to keep off most of the weight I've lost for six months now. That is a huge achievement for me. It's huge that I am not done yet, too. In the past when I've lost a chunk of weight (50 or 60 pounds, never as much as I have this time), I hit some block, tried to hold on... and then within months I'm gaining and gaining and find myself back where I started, and worse. The fact that this has not happened, that I have committed to this for over a year and a half makes me so proud of myself, despite not actively losing for a while. I've learned that I can actually maintain within a range, and that's important, too.

Anyway, I've got an appointment with my GP on March 9th. I'd really love to be able to walk in there and hop on the scale in the 250s. I really, really would.

The new session of the Ton of Fun program at Fleet Feet started again recently, and that's a good motivator; the new session of No Boundaries running group starts in the middle of February and I can't wait.

There is just so much to look forward to in 2016. I am ready to do the work and I'm ready to enjoy the results of that hard work, too!