On the Sixth Day...

Oh my gosh, it's been a week.

I have many thoughts, but right now I am in a food stupor. We'll see how it goes.

Let me start with the fact that I've been largely removing sugar from my diet since Sunday, with few exceptions (OK, so a bottle of sparkling moscato one night, a single bite of a peanut butter cookie my partner made himself, and a tiny square of super dark chocolate, for example). But seriously, this is a big change from my usual M.O. and has been quite challenging. At the same time, I've done pretty well with it. I'd really like to keep sugar as more a very occasional thing, and to not be so in need of it as I feel I have been in the past.

Today was my roughest day and I think it was a combo of sugar withdrawal and PMS. Joyous, right? I felt uncomfortable in my skin all day long, and toward the end of the day I was finding it harder and harder to be a regular person among other people (i.e. my lovely co-workers who are in fact lovely people). By 3:45, I just had to excuse myself from my desk under the pretense of "I have to make a phone call" and go sit in my car and recline and meditate and just close my eyes and try to talk myself down from whatever it was I felt was taking me over. 15 minutes later I felt better enough to finish out the last hour of the day, but man – I couldn't get out of there fast enough, and thank goodness it was Friday on top of that.

I've been taking notes about how I feel during the day every day this week. I wanted to track my cravings, my feelings, my thoughts as I went along, and in a desk job like mine that is easy. So I have pages of notes about what I ate and all the stuff that goes along with it.

One of the questions I have this week is, How should I eat? How do I want to eat? Do I really want to cut certain things out of my diet all together? Do I need to? I am going to continue to experiment as I have in the past, but I would definitely like to keep on the path of avoiding as much sugary stuff as I can.

So far I'm down about 4 pounds, though the max was 6.5 – the day after that I was back up 2 after losing 4 overnight, go figure! This is pretty typical for me. I have a lot to lose and when I put in a concentrated effort I lose fast at first.

I went a bit off the rails for dinner tonight. We did take-out for the first time this week, and I'm drinking beer. Hey, apparently the sugar in beer is NOT the bad kind. This is what my research tells me. I'm kind of like whatever after today, to be honest. I needed an off-the-rails evening tonight and I won't feel bad about it.

Oh! And another factor is... PMS. I'm all crampy and bloated which throws me off the weight-loss game. I think next week will be more interesting, then, without all those crazy hormones going on.

Whatever – I am pleased that I have set on a path in the right direction and that I am building better eating habits as a start.

More thoughts to come, as well as images of my journal notes! I would love to hear from you!