Day Five

OK. I'm making it through day five of my eight-week odyssey into the land of Much Less Starch. (I'm not sure if it's really no starch, but I do know that it is certainly much, much less starch, and certainly no white starch. I'm still a little confused on exactly what to call what I am doing. How about just, "Doctor's Orders"?) Things are... going well, much to my surprise! Is it easy? No. Is it really hard? Not really, though.

The worst part of adopting this way of eating is that it seems like EVERYTHING has some form of the stuff I'm not supposed to eat in it, and figuring out exactly what I CAN eat, and creating as much variety as I can. I have no problem not eating red meat, pork, lamb. I love fish and there are lots of things to do with chicken and turkey, and truth be told, I'd probably do fine without those, too. I love vegetables and fruits and I even like tofu! I've been eating low fat yogurt and adding extra frozen fruit to it. A quick little omelette is always good in a pinch, and a wonderful place to use our abundance of heirloom cherry tomatoes -- which, incidentally, are great as a snack on their own! Our various stir-frys without rice takes a bit of getting used to but are no less deliciosamente.

Many people are telling me that I will feel so much better that I won't want to go back to eating that white, starchy stuff. So far, I can't really tell a difference in my energy levels, which is probably due to all the running around I've been doing the past week -- I've been tired anyway, but now that I think about it... maybe not AS tired as I might have been? The coming week should be a better barometer for that. Those people may be right... but I have to be honest, I won't give up pizza completely after this eight weeks. Sure, I'll find a better way to make it, but give it up? I don't think I can go there.

I haven't really had cravings. I want things, but that's different. We went to the drive-in movies the other night. We always get popcorn and other treats at the drive-in. By the time we were getting ready to go, I hadn't eaten much during the day and was famished. Begrudgingly, I stopped at Wendy's on C.'s urging and got a salad to eat. Well, I must give kudos to Wendy's -- to my surprise, the Apple Pecan salad was delicious, and fairly well within bounds. Maybe the dried cranberries were an issue? Again, the plan given to me was so nondescript that I am not sure. Long story short, I ate my salad and enjoyed it, and I did not eat any of the popcorn or nachos with cheese that C. did. I really wanted to, but I also really didn't want to, you know? It wasn't really a tough choice, to be honest. I enjoyed the smell that wafted into my nose, and focused on Machete instead.

So, I don't really know what is going on with me, but I do feel a psychological shift. Maybe it's having the backing of a doctor who gave me parameters to work within and the expectation to stay within them? Maybe it is just that I know that I really need to make this major change in my life before it becomes really difficult, impossible, or plain old life-threatening. Funny enough, I don't feel nearly as obsessed with food as I normally do. Definitely closer to eating to live rather than living to eat. It's nice.

I want to do so much more with my life that this extra weight is, quite frankly, holding me back from doing — psychologically and/or physically. It's been a struggle for me since I was 9 years old, and I tried everything — except what I am doing now, which includes letting go of my baggage and letting someone else carry it for a while. I am hoping that this is the start of something really good for my body and my mind. It sure feels like it.