Lately

I have not been meditating.

We haven't been playing tennis as much.

I'm not doing any other kind of exercise.

My eating has pretty much gone off the rails.

I don't really know what I am doing.

And do you know what this came off of? It came off of two, no three, really positive experiences in the healthcare system. I got such good marks from my doctors that... I don't know what the rationale is for it, if any... I just felt license somehow. Maybe it was a mistake for my GYN to tell me that even if I never lost any more weight, she'd be happy because she knows how active I am and the life I try to lead most of the time.

I mean, wow, right?

So my reaction is to just totally...

I feel very heavy and not very healthy. I've been eating pretty much anything I feel like. I have managed to stay under 290, but I won't for long if I don't stop this in its tracks.

Hey, I have been here before and picked myself up and dusted myself off. I know.

In fact, I am pretty sure we'll be playing tennis tonight, which is a step in the right direction.

I keep revising my path (which is totally OK, by the way!). Here are some things I would like to focus on in the coming week:

• Re-engage my meditation practice – even a little tiny bit, but every single day. (There. I just did a 7-minute meditation on the Stop, Breathe & Think website. It was the one about change, by the way. ;)

• Stop drinking soda (yes, even diet, which is what I usually drink if I do). Go back to only drinking water. (Just threw out what I had left from lunch.)

• Continue logging food, being completely honest. (Going to log today right after this.)

• Daily weigh again, and logging in Happy Scale. No matter what. I'm pretty sure this is essential for me after having tried so many different approaches. If I know I don't have to weigh in the next day, I am more likely to eat less than ideal foods. (I will weigh in tomorrow.)

• Oatmeal and fresh fruit for breakfast, and a cup of green tea. That was a good habit to have. (Looking forward to starting the day like this tomorrow!)

I think that is enough to try to get back to for now – I don't want to give myself too much and feel like I can't do it.

What are you struggling with lately?