Frankly, things have been going just the opposite of how I want them to be going right now.
I know I have the power to turn that around, but I just haven't. The only thing I have been doing is going to my training sessions at the gym, but even this past week things got slightly derailed. Don't worry – headed back tonight right after work though.
I'm not totally blaming things on the weather, but I do think that I have been taking the turn of the season harder than I have in the recent past. It's been very cold and doing things like snowing and icing and I just can't stand it. I hate the stress of driving in those conditions, and I hate that weather like that prevents me from doing the things I want to do.
This past week, for instance:
• Wednesday I was supposed to do running group. I ended up leaving early from work because of a projected storm (good call), so no running or gym for me. I went straight home and did not want to leave again until I had to the next morning.
• Saturday I had high hopes that we'd have a reprieve, with a forecasted high in the 40s for my trip to nearby Rochester. Instead, more snow and ice and crap. I was supposed to run a race (the Reindeer Run!) and visit a good friend whom I haven't seen in years. I didn't go to the gym, either (much closer to home!). I probably could have, but again I was of the mindset not going nowhere no how. Ugh. In fact, I ended up not going anywhere at all for the whole weekend. On one hand, it was nice, but on the other, well... I just feel so down and blah.
I'm back at work today and the roads were totally clear the whole way down, no problems, but then the work parking lot? Reprehensibly covered in ice, just like an ice rink. Terrible.
Did I say how sick of this I am? And it's only December and it only just started. I am hoping that January will be gentler.
My eating has been shitty, for lack of a better word. No sugar-coating it. The last time I weighed myself a couple, few days ago I was 304, and really happy about it! Sad, right? I had been worried that I was up towards 310, so I was relieved. My goal for the end of the year is now to be under 300.
More sad. Ugh!
Total crap eating day again, but soon enough I will be at the gym making up for a tiny bit of that.
I don't know how this will end. I know what I have to do, but I am just not doing it.
Sorry this blog has become a total complain-fest do-nothing blah blah blah.